12/9/2020 0 Comments Comparison is the thief of joyStop comparing yourself to your peers. |
1. Someone will get married almost immediately after high school. 100% certain this will happen. It will probably be those high school sweethearts but you never know who in your class will bite the bullet and succumb to married life without wasting any time at all. Often times it is a peer whom you would never expect. The wild party girl who thinks it’s time to grow up overnight. The star of the football team who wants to stay relevant after falling to backup QB on his D3 team. Or that quiet girl from art class whose name has never showed up on your Facebook timeline before. |
Maybe this is you, though if you’re reading this I would guess it’s not. Don’t let the hasty decisions of your peers pressure you into jumping into something as seemingly permanent as marriage when you have ALL the time in the world to get married and settle down. These young people barely understand themselves, how can they begin to understand and care for someone else? Admittedly, some of the relationships will work out and the star couple will live happily ever after, but more likely than not (look at divorce statistics) the couple will find out they missed out on their twenties when everyone was off having fun.
If you can avoid getting married until you’re seriously ready, (like SERIOUSLY ready) you might find that patience will pay off when selecting your partner. And hey, dating around is good for you. Date different people and find out what clicks and what doesn’t.
2. One of your peers will travel the world… somehow
It’s bound to happen. One of your classmates will take a one way trip to (insert tropical paradise here) and you’ll never see them again, at least in person. You’ll see more than enough of them on your social media pages, where they’ll bombard you with constant reminders that they’re living a dream life which is “completely attainable” and “anyone can do it if they say YES to every opportunity!”
It’s bound to happen. One of your classmates will take a one way trip to (insert tropical paradise here) and you’ll never see them again, at least in person. You’ll see more than enough of them on your social media pages, where they’ll bombard you with constant reminders that they’re living a dream life which is “completely attainable” and “anyone can do it if they say YES to every opportunity!”
Unfortunately for most of us, the expectation to travel the world on a seemingly endless budget and jump from waterfalls at 10am on a Monday will not come to fruition. The most important thing to remember when following these people on social media is that someone is paying for it. Usually their parents, however there are a number of other ways money can be raised without working a real job. For 99.99% of us, this lifestyle is not going to happen because if everyone did it, there would be no more workforce. Also remember that while they are cliff diving and swimming with sharks, you are actually building skills and knowledge to propel you through the rest of your life where the instagram influencer will be left behind once the money stops flowing. |
3. One (or many) of your classmates will graduate early
I was one of these people, and trust me, it didn’t mean I was smarter or worked harder. Truth is, I had a lot of university credit from high school which transferred over seamlessly. Did I get a jump start on the real world? Yes. Was it critical? Not at all. One year in the grand scheme of life is practically a wash, and besides, college is supposed to be one of the most fun times of your life.
When else can you have class from 8am to Noon on a Friday and begin pregaming by 1 in the afternoon? When else in your life will you be surrounded by thousands and thousands of men and women whom you find attractive and whose hormones are also raging? And when else can you get away with partying the night before a big exam without worrying about getting fired or showing up to a work meeting hungover?
Truth is, college is a blast on all cylinders and taking a year away from a full college experience might have you feeling some regret. The only part of graduating early I didn’t regret was paying for another year of tuition…
I was one of these people, and trust me, it didn’t mean I was smarter or worked harder. Truth is, I had a lot of university credit from high school which transferred over seamlessly. Did I get a jump start on the real world? Yes. Was it critical? Not at all. One year in the grand scheme of life is practically a wash, and besides, college is supposed to be one of the most fun times of your life.
When else can you have class from 8am to Noon on a Friday and begin pregaming by 1 in the afternoon? When else in your life will you be surrounded by thousands and thousands of men and women whom you find attractive and whose hormones are also raging? And when else can you get away with partying the night before a big exam without worrying about getting fired or showing up to a work meeting hungover?
Truth is, college is a blast on all cylinders and taking a year away from a full college experience might have you feeling some regret. The only part of graduating early I didn’t regret was paying for another year of tuition…
| 4. Someone will make it big. Unless you graduated from a small college or private school, someone, if not many people, are going to make it big one way or another. That nerdy girl you sat behind in English 312 is now writing for the LA Times. The guy from your fraternity who majored in finance? 2 months out of school he’s working for a Fortune 500. The kid who was really into politics? He’s in the State House of Representatives now. There are a lot of very talented people out there, and a lot of luck is floating around in a void. When the perfect tide of luck, talent, and hard work meet in conjunction, someone is going to catch a great break. It’s important to remember that everyone’s path is different and just because their opportunity seemed to fall out of the sky, it’s not a zero sum game. There are writers and artists, scholars and scientists, athletes and politicians who worked at a grocery store or a warehouse for years before getting to where they are today. Everyone knows the story of Super Bowl winner Kurt Warner of the St. Louis Cardinals who worked as a cashier at a grocery store just before going pro. No two roads are the same. With enough dedication, flexibility, and resilience, you might be the one to catch the break. |
5. One of your classmates will leave college making six figures.
Your Spanish Studies major isn’t looking too hot compared to the Finance major friend of yours making enough to buy a BMW a year after graduation. While you’re shopping the discount rack at an Outlet mall, your friend is checking out the newest Michael Kors fit to go with his sleek Rolex.
Comparison is the thief of joy. Don’t let the space between your ears be filled with thoughts of feeling less important or like your life has less worth based on how much money you’re pulling in. Out of these 5 tips, this one is not only the most common, but the most damaging to your mindset. Remember how “keeping up with the Joneses” looked silly when your parents did it, and remind yourself not to fall under the jealousy trap.
In addition, do you really need all that stuff? Or do you need good people, family, self worth, and passion for your work? Would you rather have a shiny watch or a hobby you can be proud of?
When all is said and done, deep down your friend may be filling their life with meaningless items while you’re developing your hobbies and interests, which can provide much more value and long term sustainable happiness.
Your Spanish Studies major isn’t looking too hot compared to the Finance major friend of yours making enough to buy a BMW a year after graduation. While you’re shopping the discount rack at an Outlet mall, your friend is checking out the newest Michael Kors fit to go with his sleek Rolex.
Comparison is the thief of joy. Don’t let the space between your ears be filled with thoughts of feeling less important or like your life has less worth based on how much money you’re pulling in. Out of these 5 tips, this one is not only the most common, but the most damaging to your mindset. Remember how “keeping up with the Joneses” looked silly when your parents did it, and remind yourself not to fall under the jealousy trap.
In addition, do you really need all that stuff? Or do you need good people, family, self worth, and passion for your work? Would you rather have a shiny watch or a hobby you can be proud of?
When all is said and done, deep down your friend may be filling their life with meaningless items while you’re developing your hobbies and interests, which can provide much more value and long term sustainable happiness.
If we as humans negotiated our self worth based on the lives of the people around us, we would feel terrible about ourselves. It isn’t healthy to compare your situation to others when the loudest voices are the people who are “ahead”. You never hear about the guy who took 5 or 6 years to finish college or the woman who stayed single until she was 30. The flashiest people have the loudest voices, and their lives are not the norm Furthermore, it isn’t rational to think you can’t attain the things you’re envious of. Instead of comparing yourself to others, use the time to track your own growth to get where you want to be. Comparison is the thief of joy, and self acceptance is the root of happiness. |
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